A good friend of my mom's, June, helped me plan my mom's day-of-deliveries for her 60th birthday. She's the friend pictured with my mom at the end of the post about Mom's big day. Yesterday, her husband, Dean, who had been very ill and repeatedly hospitalized in recent months, shot and killed himself in their backyard.
My mom and Tim were at June's house, about to go out on a search for him, when he was found. Needless to say, they were shocked. I was shocked. And, so sad for everyone.
Please pray for June and their two grown children, Dan and Sandy, and their families as they process their shock and grief.
I find myself mad at Dean, and I didn't know him well at all. I'm sure the constant pain factored into his choice, and I feel so much sadness for him. But, he mentioned in his suicide note that he didn't want to bring his family down anymore with his illness and pain. While that's noble, I think it's an excuse, understandable perhaps, but still... What could bring your loved ones down MORE than exiting yourself in such a violent way, without any warning? Their experiences of him, their love for him, will now always be tainted by the way he shut them out of his passing. Damn.
Damn, damn, damn.
Please pray for Mom and Tim, too, as they support June in her grief.
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2 comments:
I'm so sorry for June and all of you. Susie Stern did a documentary about her father's suicide after learning of an illness and going through treatment, etc. Older men who are ill have a very very high suicide rate.
Check out the documentary (can get it through New Day www.newday.org) it's very well done.
oxox
Stacy
That's so sad. My thoughts are with the family and friends.
My father said that he considered taking his own life many times.
The reason he didn't was because he did realize that such an end would bring great sorrow to us.
Dean may have been depressed, however, and people in depression make decisions that's hard to relate to from those who aren't depressed. My father was taking antidepressants and was able to stick to his initial decision.
He lived, because he loved.
I appreciate that, more than I can say.
It is really too bad that Dean didn't.
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